Tomorrow is mid-week. I am finally starting to feel a bit human again after a tough Monday. I either pushed myself too much over the weekend or truly felt the effects of "chemo fatigue" for the 1st time. I was in bed by 7:30 last night and slept through the night. Still staying at my mom's as the work on the cabin continues. She (the cabin I refer to, not my mom! ) is looking good - the blasting is complete and her natural beauty is showing! The stain application begins tomorrow. I'll most likely return home Thursday which is when the Cabin Doctor crew predicts they will be done. Also, by Thursday I should be "myself" again and able to assist Greg in clean-up.
My hair is falling out fast and furious. I am starting to feel very "not pretty" but I am not ready yet to don my wig. Nor am I ready to wear a scarf but I am growing sensitive (which is surprising to me!) to the looks I am receiving at work and while out in public at large. Some folks apparently think I am some aging punk rocker (expressions of shock followed by a smirk....) but there are times when I catch a glimpse of what can only be described as pity. I guess I should have expected it being so public in my diagnosis and obvious treatment but I really did not think it would bother me. I am trying to remain strong but there are days when this whole mess just seems so overwhelming. Hmm, seems it is my bedtime: it is just past 8pm! I look forward to waking up and feeling even a bit better! I may even attempt to run in the AM!
4 comments:
You know, when my mother was so sick we decided to take it public in a big way -- emails, phone calls, etc. The end result was that the more who knew, the more prayers and possitive thoughts she received. Bottom line - it worked! Keep the faith:-)
love,
Pam
Keep the faith sweetheart.
Aunt Jane
Yes...just remember, BELIEVE, that there is a higher power and it ALWAYS keeps us safe!
A mantra from Louise L. Hay's Heal Your Body.
Cancer:
I lovingly forgive and release all of the past. I choose to fill my world with joy. I love and approve of myself.
Breast Problems:
I am important. I count. I now care for and nourish myself with love and with joy. I allow others the freedom to be who they are. We are all safe and free.
I love her books....they got me to accept, love and appreciate myself with illness....
Love and most positive thoughts to you, ALWAYS!
Mary
Jane,
Don't worry about the looks at work. You know how 'high school' Medco can be. LOL
ciao,
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