365 Days Later

It is April 7th, 2009. 365 days have come and gone since I heard those few words that would impact my life so greatly: "I'm sorry, your biopsy was positive. You have cancer." I do not quite recall what the doctor said after that. I know I stood there waiting for the punchline that was never delivered and then realized she wasn't kidding and this situation was not funny. What a year. While I may not look back and laugh, I do look back at what I have learned.

I spent last evening at the wake of a local 39 year old woman who dies of breast cancer. She was a wife of a former co-worker of mine. She was a mother, a teacher, and judging by the photos her husband Jim had on display last night, someone who loved life. As I waited over an hour to say something to Jim, it was he who said something to me. He was aware of my battle during the past year. He asked how I was doing - how I was doing? How about him? I said I take each day as it comes and he said to me, "Do not forget that every day is a gift, that is what my days with Karen were and that is what I told my daughter too". Those words reminded quickly reminded me how wrapped up I had become in the trivial again, how "normal life" had quickly become a familiar routine.

So as I laced my sneakers this morning for a run I thought about Jim's words and the past year and I made a point to look at the sky as the sun rose through the clouds. I left my iPod home so I could hear myself think. As I ran I sent many, many thank yous to the heavens as I feel good, I can run, and I can say, "Cancer? Been there, done that - last year."

If you are reading this note through Facebook, this is actually a post to my blog, www.jchildebrandt.blogspot.com. I started my blog 4/17 - 10 days after diagnosis as a place to keep family and friends up to date as to what was going on with me and also as a way to share my experience with any other woman who may facing similar circumstances. I will continue to write and continue to fight until, well, I am not sure where or how it this will end but that is part of what makes life worth living - hey, you never know what tomorrow might bring so be sure to enjoy today!