I spent last weekend in the mountains of New Hampshire with 11 people crazy enough to join me on "The Situation"; my team for the 2010 Reach the Beach Relay. To know what this event is like, first stay awake for 30 hours, run anywhere from 4 - 8 miles every six hours while awake and make sure the last 1/4 mile is on a nice sandy beach. Throw in 5000 other runners, more porta-potties than you ever want to see, and there - doesn't it sound like fun???
Actually it was and I have to say we laughed - a lot! (What else do you do at 3am when you are awake and wearing a headlamp?) Upon crossing the finish line I thought to myself - "there, another thing on my list - complete!". It wasn't until later this week when reading a magazine article about Randy Pausch that the whole "bucket list" concept really impacted me. You may recall Randy's very poignant "Last Lecture" as he was a professor at Carnegie Mellon who became a YouTube sensation for giving his students the lecture of a lifetime just prior to his death. Anyway, like I said, I was reading an article where Dr. Oz was recalling a conversation he had with Randy when they spoke about taking a trip to swim with the dolphins. Randy stated it took a terminal diagnosis for him to take his family on this trip they had always dreamed of. Dr. Oz, hearing Randy's message loud and clear, booked the same trip for his family that very day for he realized how quickly life can change and why not do those things on our "lists" for if we do not - will we ever?
For me that is what it was all about - just doing something many consider outside the norm. For those who have done it (even though we may groan and complain during every one of those 30 hours) holding that medal can be pretty satisfying. The past 3 years have been full of teachable moments and if I have learned anything it has been that my list will always get longer but as long as I can continually cross things off of it, then I am truly living.
Hmm, not sure why I am feeling somewhat so introspective at 5:30am. I suppose the fact that I am getting ready for a 20 mile training run with my brother may have something to do with it. Running a marathon with my brother - yes, another item off my list. What is on yours and what are you doing to make sure you get to cross those things off as "completed"?
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Life lessons
Wow - September arrived and is rushing by...we are just about at the mid-point of the month already. This past weekend was a busy one. We attended "Lobsterfest" 2010 with some of my "BFFs" on a day that was picture perfect. So picture perfect you could not help but compare it the day 9 years earlier that changed all of us forever. The sky was that same picture perfect blue; not a cloud in sight. We reflected on our lives and toasted to the fact we were together and we were healthy: it was a wonderful day.
Today, I walked 3.1 miles in Central Park with 24,000 other people all somehow impacted by breast cancer. I was one of 1,600 survivors. Unfortunately I was "alone" - my husband had to work and my mom was off on a long planned vacation. Since I was team captain for my employer's corporate team, I needed to get into the city early so got up in the dark, ate breakfast, donned my best pink finery and hit the road. I admit to feeling very sad as a drove in to NYC. Sure, I was going to be walking with my co-workers and seeing a post from my friend Lauren in the early morning hours made me smile; but I could not kick the blues even though surrounded by a sea of pink.
I gathered with other folks from the team and it was then I started to feel a bit better. Two co-workers were walking "just because" and both of them were fairly new to the company. I walked with a small group and I enjoyed talking to all of them. The rain held out until the end and only lasted a few minutes. I decided to stop of at the survivor village. Out of the blue a fellow survivor walked up to me and asked if I was by myself. When I said, yes, I was there by myself, she said, "So am I" - she hugged me and said, "Aren't we lucky?"
Those few words snapped me out of my funk and I realized, yes, we were lucky. We were there, we were walking, we had made it through and were able to say we were survivors. As I looked out at the sea of people walking past me - so many with the words "In Memory of..." scribed on their shirt along with a name it caused me to take pause. I was in the park today- pink hair and all - thanks to those who may have not been with me today but were with me when I needed them most. Lucky indeed.
Today, I walked 3.1 miles in Central Park with 24,000 other people all somehow impacted by breast cancer. I was one of 1,600 survivors. Unfortunately I was "alone" - my husband had to work and my mom was off on a long planned vacation. Since I was team captain for my employer's corporate team, I needed to get into the city early so got up in the dark, ate breakfast, donned my best pink finery and hit the road. I admit to feeling very sad as a drove in to NYC. Sure, I was going to be walking with my co-workers and seeing a post from my friend Lauren in the early morning hours made me smile; but I could not kick the blues even though surrounded by a sea of pink.
I gathered with other folks from the team and it was then I started to feel a bit better. Two co-workers were walking "just because" and both of them were fairly new to the company. I walked with a small group and I enjoyed talking to all of them. The rain held out until the end and only lasted a few minutes. I decided to stop of at the survivor village. Out of the blue a fellow survivor walked up to me and asked if I was by myself. When I said, yes, I was there by myself, she said, "So am I" - she hugged me and said, "Aren't we lucky?"
Those few words snapped me out of my funk and I realized, yes, we were lucky. We were there, we were walking, we had made it through and were able to say we were survivors. As I looked out at the sea of people walking past me - so many with the words "In Memory of..." scribed on their shirt along with a name it caused me to take pause. I was in the park today- pink hair and all - thanks to those who may have not been with me today but were with me when I needed them most. Lucky indeed.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
September Already?
The past few weeks have been busy which I guess is why it seems time is flying by. I have committed to running the Marine Corps Marathon with my brother and friend Jess on Halloween. So, yes in eight short weeks I'll once again do that crazy 26.2 mile run. (Note emphasis on "crazy"!) Training has begun and we are up to 16 miles for our long runs. Yes, training sucks up a lot of time.
Speaking of training my tri season has come to an end, capped off nicely with me taking home the above pictured souvenir from the inaugural Asbury Park SheRox event. Greg and I had a fabulous weekend "down at the shore" - thankfully I was not cognizant of the fact that the water I was swimming through for the swim leg of my tri felt like tapioca due to the multitudes of jellyfish, and the beautiful homes of Deal distracted me from registering the miles I pedaled on my bike. We had wonderful meals at places like Moonstruck, The Boards, Stella Marina and Avenue. Asbury Park, Long Branch, and Ocean Grove have come a long way since the days of my late teens and early 20's when we would not even stop in town on our way to the beach due to fear of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. The weekend was hot and sunny, the beaches packed with Snooki and Situation wanna-bes, the boardwalk full of folks strolling along desperate for an ocean breeze, and in late evening the moon rose up over the ocean a brilliant red-orange orb that slowly faded to rose then to white providing a spectacular show over the water. Ah summer - how I hate to see you go!
As much as I hate for summer to end, I do admit to truly enjoying the fall. I love the crisp air and seeing the riot of colors that autumn brings to the trees. I love wearing sweaters and the smell of the first fire being stoked in neighborhood fireplaces. September brings many great events - the Komen Race for the Cure, the 2010 Reach the Beach Relay, and the season finale of True Blood. I have one more visit to my oncologist for my final Zometa infusion and that should be it for doctor visits for the year. When I look back at the summer of 2010 I'll recall the incredible weather I had while staying on the Cape; diving through the waves at the Jersey Shore; and the birth of our newest neighbor Sofia Isis Jones. Surgery seems so long ago, my incision scars are slowly fading from an angry red to light pink, and I have no need to return to the Cancer Center until next year. Until then I have training to do, holidays and birthdays to celebrate, places to go and people to see - so, "so long summer", I am sure my longing for you will hit just around say March...
Monday, August 16, 2010
Follow up
It is a gloomy Monday morning and I am getting ready to make the trek into NYC to visit my doctor - well, one of my doctors! It has been seven weeks since my surgery so I am hopeful she will tell me that I am finally healing as I should, that my stitches have dissolved and that I will not need to see her again until next year.
I'll be heading back to the NYU Cancer Center in only another two weeks for my mammogram. This excursion of course brings a certain amount of anxiety to my life. For the next few days I cannot help but recall the mammogram that started the need for this blog. Yes, I am thankful my cancer was caught, removed, treated. I am thankful that we have technology that allows this sort of diagnosis to no longer be a death sentence and every year treatment options get better. Still, I will have butterflies and restless sleep until I get the "all clear" that day.
Thankfully we had a wonderful weekend - dinner with friends Friday evening to kick it off; a glorious Saturday sunny and cool on which we attended an open water swim clinic on Lake Hopatcong (well, that was only me) my 25th (OMG!) high school reunion, our neighbor's 2nd birthday and a lake celebration with friends. All said I was still in bed before ten but guess my body needed the sleep as I missed my Sunday morning cycling date. I ended up swimming laps and running ten miles in the rain with my brother. I'll see what the doctor says this morning about how this body of mine is healing and make my decision. I best get going as Monday morning traffic is never good!
I'll be heading back to the NYU Cancer Center in only another two weeks for my mammogram. This excursion of course brings a certain amount of anxiety to my life. For the next few days I cannot help but recall the mammogram that started the need for this blog. Yes, I am thankful my cancer was caught, removed, treated. I am thankful that we have technology that allows this sort of diagnosis to no longer be a death sentence and every year treatment options get better. Still, I will have butterflies and restless sleep until I get the "all clear" that day.
Thankfully we had a wonderful weekend - dinner with friends Friday evening to kick it off; a glorious Saturday sunny and cool on which we attended an open water swim clinic on Lake Hopatcong (well, that was only me) my 25th (OMG!) high school reunion, our neighbor's 2nd birthday and a lake celebration with friends. All said I was still in bed before ten but guess my body needed the sleep as I missed my Sunday morning cycling date. I ended up swimming laps and running ten miles in the rain with my brother. I'll see what the doctor says this morning about how this body of mine is healing and make my decision. I best get going as Monday morning traffic is never good!
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
The Long and The Short of It
It has been an interesting summer so far. We are in the home stretch: the hot and humid days of August have arrived and the days grow shorter. Tomorrow marks six weeks post surgery for me. I feel pretty good but have not healed as quickly as I would have liked. I still have my stitches, doing ab work is not yet a good thing and I had to skip a triathlon last weekend because I was still experiencing some "side effects" of healing - I will not go into graphic detail but suffice to say my body was readily telling me I was in no shape to swim/bike/run.
Well, that was last week. I am going to try again - or is that "tri again"? This weekend brings the Pequannock Tri, a shorter distance tri and one I think manageable. I say this as I prepare to go practice an open water swim at 9pm with my brother. Hmm - this should prove interesting. At least no one will see me struggle in and out of my wetsuit!
Our kitchen renovation is complete, again I ask myself why I have these types of projects completed while I am home dealing with a complex disease. In 2008 while in the throes of chemotherapy we had the cabin sandblasted and restained. I stayed at my mom's. This go around we ripped down walls, cabinets, the works. I stayed at my mom's, my dad's and my in-laws. It is good to have family both nearby and those who live in a summer vacation spot!
While convalescing after surgery and awaiting the dreaded results phone call I decided that if I indeed was going to face chemotherapy once again, I was going to go long first. Hence the photo above. Extensions were fun but very hot. I feel much lighter without them but plan on having them againn soon - perhaps in the cold winter months.
Much to look forward to during these dog days of summer: I'll be seeing the Adams Family on Broadway, visiting with my friend Patrice who is coming to town from Missouri, I'll be honored by the Komen NYC Race for the Cure for once again being one of the top 100 fundraisers - this time for 2009; my 25th (gasp!) high school reunion is being held nearby, I have tickets to Tears fro Fears with Jess and hope to participate in the SheRox Triathlon at the end of the month. Whew! I best go hit the lake!!!
Monday, July 26, 2010
Race for the Cure
While I am in denial that July is in its last week, I truly cannot believe it is once again time for the annual NYC Race for the Cure! On Sunday September 12th, I'll once again don my favorite pink attire and join the thousands of others who have been impacted in some way by breast cancer.
This year I have volunteered to lead my corporate team and set aggressive goals for both the team and myself. Why not consider joining us? I have walked for the past seven years and the day is always a good one! If you are unable to join us for a walk, please consider making a donation. I try to "talk the talk and walk the walk" and I can honestly say that I have benefited from the funds that the Komen organization has helped raise. The breakthroughs in research and treatment options made my experience with breast cancer one that I survived. My hope is that one day, women will no longer have to worry about breast cancer at all. Now wouldn't that be a wonderful day?
With all this cancer talk, I guess I should I add I am headed to the cancer center today for my 1st true exam following my surgery. I am confident all should be fine - I think the commute in will be the most difficult aspect of the day! However with cooler temperatures having arrived via the torrential downpours we had yesterday afternoon, an afternoon jaunt into the city may not be so bad. Have a great week!
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Real World
nor·mal /ˈnɔrməl/ Show Spelled[nawr-muhl] Show IPA
–adjective
1. conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural.
2. serving to establish a standard.
3. Psychology .
a. approximately average in any psychological trait, as intelligence, personality, or emotional adjustment.
b. free from any mental disorder; sane.
4. Biology, Medicine/Medical .
a. free from any infection or other form of disease or malformation, or from experimental therapy or manipulation.
b. of natural occurrence.
As crazy as it may seem, tomorrow marks my return to the real world - aka back to work! I feel great and the past three weeks of inpatient hospital stays, lounging on Cape Cod and watching the last touches being added to my new kitchen seem incredibly surreal.
Thankfully my results from surgery were all good. No need for further treatment. I have already experienced the lovely time of life called menopause due to chemotherapy so no big surprises there. I do experience occasional twinges and I still tire easily but I cannot wait to hit the pool this Thursday and, the good lord willing, I'll be participating in the inaugural Pass It Along Triathlon on July31st at Lake Mohawk.
I am once again incredibly indebted to my friends and family. My parents and my in-laws were the best - providing places to rest, relax, and recharge after my surgery. My thanks and love cannot be put into written word. My friends have once again restored my faith in the human race: I received cards, calls, books, flowers, etc. - so many folks sending words and prayers - how could I not beat this monster? And of course - I owe most of my well being to my husband. Who else could stand by me as I fought with nurses to remove my catheter and demanded to be discharged? Oh boy, you have got to love general anesthesia!
Speaking of friends, I have to comment once again about the technology of the 21st century. I have been so blessed to reconnect with so many people. This time it was my pal Allie from good ol' BHS with whom I met for dinner and cannot wait to see again. I hate to admit it but Facebook does have its redeeming qualities! Speaking of which did I mention my 25th high school reunion is coming up? Yessiree folks, that is 25 years.... I watched "Hot Tub Time Machine" with my Dad and his wife while I was on the Cape and laughed out loud until I realized that the 80's had become comical!
I hope to return to training this week. My next doctor appointment is the 26th. I hope to hear I am healing well! I can still feel those stitches!
–adjective
1. conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural.
2. serving to establish a standard.
3. Psychology .
a. approximately average in any psychological trait, as intelligence, personality, or emotional adjustment.
b. free from any mental disorder; sane.
4. Biology, Medicine/Medical .
a. free from any infection or other form of disease or malformation, or from experimental therapy or manipulation.
b. of natural occurrence.
As crazy as it may seem, tomorrow marks my return to the real world - aka back to work! I feel great and the past three weeks of inpatient hospital stays, lounging on Cape Cod and watching the last touches being added to my new kitchen seem incredibly surreal.
Thankfully my results from surgery were all good. No need for further treatment. I have already experienced the lovely time of life called menopause due to chemotherapy so no big surprises there. I do experience occasional twinges and I still tire easily but I cannot wait to hit the pool this Thursday and, the good lord willing, I'll be participating in the inaugural Pass It Along Triathlon on July31st at Lake Mohawk.
I am once again incredibly indebted to my friends and family. My parents and my in-laws were the best - providing places to rest, relax, and recharge after my surgery. My thanks and love cannot be put into written word. My friends have once again restored my faith in the human race: I received cards, calls, books, flowers, etc. - so many folks sending words and prayers - how could I not beat this monster? And of course - I owe most of my well being to my husband. Who else could stand by me as I fought with nurses to remove my catheter and demanded to be discharged? Oh boy, you have got to love general anesthesia!
Speaking of friends, I have to comment once again about the technology of the 21st century. I have been so blessed to reconnect with so many people. This time it was my pal Allie from good ol' BHS with whom I met for dinner and cannot wait to see again. I hate to admit it but Facebook does have its redeeming qualities! Speaking of which did I mention my 25th high school reunion is coming up? Yessiree folks, that is 25 years.... I watched "Hot Tub Time Machine" with my Dad and his wife while I was on the Cape and laughed out loud until I realized that the 80's had become comical!
I hope to return to training this week. My next doctor appointment is the 26th. I hope to hear I am healing well! I can still feel those stitches!
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